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by drew

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The last two months in a picture (and also words)

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So it’s been approximately ages since I’ve done anything in this space, so I figured I’d quickly summarize my last two months with a picture.

(Numbers are roughly clockwise)

1) My torn-apart Eee PC 901. A while back, I broke the LCD by using it as a carrying handle, a use it neither was designed for nor deserved. So I ordered a replacement and assumed I’d be able to install it myself. This was a good assumption; expecting the shipper to send precisely the right model was not. All-in-all, the pins didn’t match up and the backlight didn’t work. Ordering the right part soon.

2) Machine of Death. A great book that I’ve been reading. I think it might be the first actual hold-it-in-your-hands paper book I’ve bought for my own personal reading enjoyment in years.

3) 3D glasses. I was on an Amazon shopping spree and figured why not.

4) My newly repaired Macbook Pro. The turdbiscuits at the Apple Store finally believed me that the issue was the same one I told them it was all along, namely that the Wi-Fi card was Wi-Fried, and repaired the slut of a laptop. So far, so good, but I’ve renamed it “Morgan”.

5) Playstation 2 and Persona 4. I picked up a used PS2 and a bunch of games for dirt cheap over the holidays and have really been enjoying it. Persona 4 is the one game I’ve spent the most time on, over 20 hours according to my save file but many more hours were played but lost to death. It’s really quite fun and I’m looking forward to playing more of it.

6) Magic: The Gathering deck. Yes, I’ve gotten into Magic. I have a few friends with whom I play a couple times a week and currently have 3 decks. Hopefully, I will be able to refrain from converting my entire life savings into trading card form.

7) My DVD copy of The Social Network. The local Blockbuster is shutting down and are in the process of liquidating their DVD inventory, so everything is on sale for, again, dirt cheap. I picked up the special edition of what I consider to be 2010’s best film for a delicious $8.


Otherwise, most of my time has been spent on game development and school. I made another Oceanspirit Dennis game and am currently working on two other unrelated, non-OSD game projects. I also might be working with a certain someone on a certain something that may or may not certainly be a book.


Written by Drew Wellman

01/25/2011 at 12:14 AM

Everything You Need To Know About Economics

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If I want to graduate on time and receive both my Electrical Engineering and Computer Science degrees, which I do, my school forces me to pay up and take a summer course completely unrelated to my major, which I am. Thus, I’m stuck in the night-class purgatory that is microeconomics. I’ve had three classes so far and am fairly sure that I have learned everything there is to know about economics. If you, for some demented reason, want to enter this strange field, here is all you need to know:

  1. A fourth grade level understanding of mathematics. Seems those three semesters of Calculus were all for naught, at least in economics. Here is a comprehensive list of all the mathematical concepts I have used in this course: averaging two numbers, the point-slope formula, solving a simple single variable algebraic equation, and percent difference.
  2. Supply and demand. High supply and low demand mean low prices; low supply and high demand mean high prices. Or something like that. There’s other factors, but we’re not supposed to consider them because we’d have to solve equations with more than one variable. Gasp!
  3. Profit is total revenue minus total cost. If reading this made you feel enlightened, then you have a promising career projecting the future of the national economy on MSNBC.
  4. Those cheeseburger-flavored Doritos are kinda neat the first time, but get really gross really fast. High-level stuff, I know.
  5. Please let me integrate something before I lose my mind. My brain is melting.

So, in short, if you are not at all mathematically inclined and want a big fancy piece of paper saying how special you are, economics is for you. Hopefully, I’ll survive until the fall semester, when Physics 3 and Probability will have a chance to revive my dead brain cells.

Also, totally unrelated, but you should keep your eyes peeled for this sweet game that’s emerging very soon from the creative womb of my good friend and coworker, Igor Hardy.


Written by Drew Wellman

06/30/2010 at 3:53 PM

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Oceanspirit Dennis

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As my love of the name “Dennis” should be quite evident by now, it is no coincidence that some fellows and I created a character, nay, a new universe containing the name. Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you…

Oceanspirit Dennis


The basic idea behind OSD is that through all manner of unusual events, I ended up drawing the above picture and a hero was born. He is the forbidden lovechild of Batman and Cloud Strife, torn between a life of crime-fighting and being a typical JRPG protagonist poof. As such, he is perfect game-starring material and has so far been the focus of five games. Here they are in chronological order.

  1. OSD: Scourge of the Underworld, by Ben304
  2. OSD: Scourge of the Underworld DX, by me.
  3. OSD: Mighty Pirate, by Ben304
  4. OSD: The RPG, by discordance
  5. OSD: Pirates On The Poopdeck!, by Ponch

So you can see the guy has quite a career ahead of him. In fact, if downloads aren’t your thing, you can actually play Scourge of the Underworld right here in your browser by clicking these words! Pretty sweet, huh? One thing of note, part of OSD’s genesis involved a forum troll with a particularly loose grasp of the Queen’s English, so a couple of those games have appropriately incoherent dialog as a homage. Not mine, however, which instead includes voice acting! NICE. Here’s Oceanspirit Dennis’ new look, too.

Also, I played the first three hours of Metal Gear Solid 3 with a friend the other day. Or, more accurately, I watched two hours of MGS3 and played an hour.

Finally, new Hardydev review by me on a pretty sweet game called Yoomurjak’s ring. This one is a video review, baby.

Written by Drew Wellman

05/29/2010 at 10:58 PM

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A Love Story

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Here’s a touching romance tale I wrote a while back. I hope it makes you cry.

In North Dakota in late March, Jack Frost was having his swan song for the year. After a long, typically cold winter, the last blizzard of the season seemed intent on making an impact. Roads were impassible, stores were closed, and a large percentage of the small town of Rutmuffin was snowed in.
“FFFFUUUUUU-” Jeremy shouted, stumbling in the front door.
His wife looked up from her Better Homes and Gardens magazine. “I told you it wouldn’t run.”
“I hate the cold. I hate winter. I hate North Dakota and I hate the US Postal service,” Jeremy replied. “What ever happened to ‘neither snow nor rain’ and all that?”
“You know that was never actually their motto.”
“You know what I mean, Sandy.”
“Still,” she responded, “it is a shame that the replacement part for our furnace would get stuck in this storm.”
Jeremy was not amused by the irony. Something else was bothering him.
“Why don’t you take off that damn Snuggie?” he asked curtly.
Sandy looked in shock. “It’s warm! Plus I can read my magazine without having to adjust a blanket.”
“You sound like one of those freakin’ commercials,” Jeremy snapped. “How incompetent do you have to be to not know how to operate a simple blanket?”
“Are you calling me stupid?” Sandy said, her voice starting to crack.
“No… no, it’s just…” Jeremy trailed off. “I just think you’re better than a Snuggie. I watch the people on TV and they just seem so idiotic, so typically American, and I’ve always thought you were above that.”
Sandy’s eyes started to water. “I know how you feel about them, and I want you to be happy, but try to understand. I got this thing from my mother for Christmas and it’s really quite practical. You of all people should understand that.”
Jeremy sighed. “I do. I’m sorry I yelled at you. I want you to know that I really do love you.”
A grin creeped its way across Sandy’s face. “You know… ” she whispered, “there’s another reason I’m wearing the Snuggie…”
“Huh? What’s that?”
“I’m only wearing the Snuggie.”
Oh…” Jeremy heaved as Sandy’s smile effected one on his own face. “Is there room for two in there?”

And they made Snuggie Love.

Written by Drew Wellman

01/28/2010 at 11:54 AM

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McCarthy Chronicles: Episode 1 Video Review

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Here’s a short little video review I made to a short little adventure game. I did it for A Hardy Developer’s Journal, a site you should totally read every day at least 14 times.

Game created by Steve Poulton, aka Calin Leafshade. Site: http://thethoughtradar.com
Download game

Written by Drew Wellman

01/16/2010 at 8:55 PM

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5 things we’d better have by the end of the next decade or I’m seriously gonna lose my mind

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Every generation has a different view of the future, but people have been hoping for some things since the 20’s and humanity continues to drop the ball. Things like…

5) Space Elevators

Get this, according to Wikipedia, the technology for these things has existed since 1978. They’d even pay for themselves! After you get the elevator operational, just charge gratuitous amounts of money for people to have a couple hours in space. It worked for Richard Branson, and he hasn’t even taken anyone yet.

4) Spinal cord Bluetooth implants

This great idea belongs to Andy Ihnatko and would eliminate the need for printers, displays, keyboards, speakers, hell, basically everything needed for using your magical audio-visual communication and computation device today. Of course there’s the obvious security issues of your brain being open to wireless hacking, but there’s nothing in there that you haven’t already posted to twitter, facebook, and youtube.

3) The death of 3D

I don’t care what anyone says about 3D being “more realistic” or “the next big advancement in cinema/gaming.” They’re wrong. It isn’t. It hurts your eyes and causes visual overload. When I saw Avatar, (one word review: meh), I spent the whole time thinking how much I’d rather see the film in 2D, or at least a better film. Avatar’s problem was that the 3D made the already-pushing-it-in-terms-of-believability aliens lose all realism and turned them back into digital freaks. Also, particles in 3D are the most distracting thing ever; you’re trying to watch two characters converse but your eyes can’t lock down on one of the dozens of vertical planes in which movement occurs. Stupid flower petals/ashes/holy flying anemonae.

2) An Apple tablet

Seriously, Apple, get on that.

1) Laws against the stuff the 60’s people wanted

I know, personal jetpacks and time machines would be cool, but have you stopped to think about how impractical and dangerous those things would be? Time machines, if possible, have the dangers of paradoxes up the bum and jetpacks would need way too many safety features and airspace regulation. Don’t even get me started on artificial intelligence. Some of these things are just too dangerously powerful and powerfully dangerous to be created.

So on the whole, humanity as a whole has a lot of work to do over the next 10 years to keep me happy, which, admittedly, is probably not the best goal for the entire world to pursue.

Written by Drew Wellman

01/05/2010 at 6:23 PM

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12 hour retrospective.

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So I succeeded in staying in bed for 24 hours straight. All in all, it was a fun experience, though I don’t plan to do it again anytime soon unless it’s for charity or something. Some highlights…

  • I’d say most of my time was spent with video games, and most of my video game time was spent with Fallout 3. So far, pretty nice game, though arguably inferior to Mass Effect in most ways besides combat, graphics, and auto-saving. But it’s a different type of game for a different audience.
  • It seems every time I rent Spider-Man 2, the DVD is scratched or really dirty or something else that prevents me from watching it all the way through. I still don’t recall if I’ve ever seen the whole thing.
  • The best way to scare off someone on Omegle asking “m or f?” is to respond “lioness.”
  • Richard Feynman’s a beast.

Written by Drew Wellman

12/19/2009 at 12:52 AM

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